If you were here...

If you were here...
you wouldn't have wanted us to make a big deal
of the fact that today is your birthday.
you would've welcomed the day
ready to tackle today as though it was just like every other day
you would've done for somebody other than yourself
you would've given your all to make sure the job was done right
and been happy to have it just that way.

If you were here...
today we would've sung you a birthday song
the kids would've gathered around me
to make a lop sided birthday cake covered in fingerprints
they would've given you a handmade card with handwriting that is hard to read
and you would've acted as if were the greatest gift you had ever gotten
we would've seen that soft smile stay on your face all day
and we would've thanked God for another year to share with you
if you were here.

that wasn't to be

so instead...
I ask God to search Heaven for you
when He finds you
I ask Him to interrupt your time of
joy and laughter for just a moment
and tell you how my heart feels today.

My prayer is that
He will tell you how much
I miss you today
I pray that He will tell you
one more time
how much your life meant to many
but most of all to me.
the little things you did....
from allowing a scared little red-head
to climb into your bed once again
to
the little notes you left
for me from time to time
to
the birthday cakes
made special
because they were made by you
just for me.
to the big things you did....
sacrificing so much of yourself
so that others wouldn't be in need,
doing without time after time
so that I could have better.

you never knew
what a truly remarkable
Daughter
Wife
MOTHER
Sister
Friend
you were.
but
I know
I remember
I cherish

this song reminds me of so many times in my life
you were there for me saying,
I am here
and
though you're in heaven now
there are so many times
I still hear you
and
times that I find
that God himself
fills your shoes,
who could ask for more



Happy Birthday Mom
I love you & miss you
Today & Always